Will I get eaten by a mountain lion today?

Mountain lions are scary.

Take a look at this guy (or girl).  I'm planning a hike today, so I want to know if I will get eaten by a mountain lion. Like the 20 or so other people who have been reported to have been killed (and probably eaten) by mountain lions in North America in the past 100 years or so.

Twenty killed in 100 years? Not so scary. But how about just plain and simple maiming attacks where someone is horribly disfigured or reluctantly donates a limb to a mountain lion's collection of gross souvenirs?

Is it soup yet?

Have you ever visited a mountain lion's lair? Probably makes Buffalo Bill's house of torture look like the Metropolitan Museum by comparison. (I'm talking about the Buffalo Bill from "Silence of the Lambs," not the one from the old West."

Looking at the actual statistics for California, the risks look pretty low: Between 1986 and 2013, there are 14 recorded attacks, and that includes fatal and non-fatal. Here's some helpful advice:

"As with many predators, a cougar may attack if cornered, if a fleeing human stimulates their instinct to chase, or if a person 'plays dead'. Standing still however may cause the cougar to consider a person easy prey. Exaggerating the threat to the animal through intense eye contact, loud shouting, and any other action to appear larger and more menacing, may make the animal retreat. Fighting back with sticks and rocks, or even bare hands, is often effective in persuading an attacking cougar to disengage."

So, no playing dead or standing still: That might seem like a way of saying, "Hey, Mountain Lion, I'm no danger to you." But in fact what you're saying is, "Hey, Mountain Lion, I'm a Happy Meal, bagged, paid for and ready to eat." 

By the way, an unintended consequence of looking into what's scary and unlikely to occur is that you'll uncover what's scary and is likely to occur.

"Fatal cougar attacks are extremely rare and occur much less frequently than fatal dog attacks, fatal snake bites, fatal lightning strikes, or fatal bee stings."  

Well, looking at the statistics, I think the risk is actually low.